Grieving in the Closet

The grief and loss following the death of a loved one can overwhelm us. One of the unthinkable, yet unavoidable, tasks that confronts us is what we should do with our loved one’s belongings. Some choose to do nothing, to avoid dealing with the inevitable pain that is evoked. Others choose to discard anything and everything that was owned or even touched by the loved one who died.

There is no “right” or “wrong” time or way to pass on the property of your loved one. Rest assured that you will know when the time is right for you, and what you will want to keep, and what you will want to give away. This task can be an important time for reflection, expressing your grief, loss, and sadness, and strengthening your connections with family members and friends. Like viewing your family picture albums, take your time, examine each object, and feel and embrace the memories in your heart.

No matter what you choose to do with your loved one’s possessions, usually some items or objects are meant to be kept. A kitchen tool, personal photographs, pillow, shop tool, toy, wedding ring or other piece of jewelry, are cherished symbols of your special relationship. At first, these items may evoke sad, tender feelings of your recent loss. However, in time, these objects will become keepsakes that recall cherished and fond memories.

Know that we continue to pray for and think about you, and all of your loved ones. We hope you will find this to be encouraging and helpful to you. If you would like to speak to someone personally, please do not hesitate to contact our Bereavement Coordinator, Thomas Schwartz. He can be reached at 918-994-4807. God bless and keep you!